WWE Survivor Series 2013 Pick Em

• Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

Hank Booth: The Miz has always worked better as a heel for me. While he hasn’t exactly been ‘The Most Must-See WWE Superstar’ inside of the ring of late, he can still slay it on the mic if given the opportunity. This is cute little kick off match where Kofi gets a chance to get his revenge on Miz for doing him dirty this past week on Raw.  I’m predicting a clean ending after a little bit of Trouble in Paradise.

Sean Sheehan: The Miz will win. Yawn. Move on.

Alex Reno: This is probably the most meaningless kickoff to a PPV in a while. I really am not a fan of The Miz, but WWE sure seems to love him and want him to stick around. Kofi will make it a decent match and end up in a figure-four leg lock. Verdict: The Miz

Chris Langevin:  HALLELUJAH!!! THE MIZ IS FINALLY A BAD GUY AGAIN!!! I couldn’t take it anymore. Sure, either way he will probably never regain his Wrestlemania Main Eventing status, but I couldn’t watch that terribly good guy shtick he was doing any longer. That was just brutal. He needs to be a bad guy. He has a smug look to him. He is engaged to one of the hottest divas of the past 5 years (Maryse). We want to hate this guy, we need to hate this guy. He’s just a reality show, wrestling star wannabe. There is NO reason for us as fans to like him, so stop trying to make us. I love the Miz as a bad guy, so I’m on board with him beating Kofi and taking home the Kickoff win.

• Intercontinental Championship: Big E Langston (C) vs. Curtis Axel

Booth: Excuse me for a moment while I go on a mini rant of sorts. Back when I was a youth my favorite championship was the Intercontinental Championship. Not only because it looked better than the rest of the belts (at the time) but because my favorite, and the most interesting guys were always feuding over it. It was the cool belt to win. I never really cared about Hogan or the WWF title. It was all about Santana and Valentine, Savage and Steamboat; guys like  Ravishing Rick Rude, Ultimate Warrior and even Curtis Axel’s father Mr. Perfect. These guys were where it was at. Lately it’s like nobody cares about the IC championship. Sure, it was a nice moment to see Axel pay tribute to his late father at Payback. It was great to see Langston earn his first WWE title as well. The rivalries haven’t been there though. The prestige is no longer there either. Hopefully that changes. As far as this match goes, I don’t see Langston losing his belt anytime soon. He needs a good rival to go head-to-head with though and I don’t feel like it’s Axel. This should be his last shot at this belt for a while.

Sheehan: I was really surprised when Big E won the title last week. He is a tremendous wrestler along with his athletic ability and it was great to see him chop down the wooden Axel. I don’t think Langston will lose his title anytime soon and see him winning this one with relative ease.

Reno: Now that Paul Heyman is nowhere to be seen, Ryback and Axel have nowhere to go for now. I wasn’t surprised to see Langston taking the Intercontinental Championship on live TV, because you knew it was going to happen eventually. He deserves a big push, and he’s much better as a face than heel. He’s a freak of nature, but his special move is pretty weak to me. Big E keeps his belt, and we see a lot less of Axel in the near future. Verdict: Big E. Langston

Langevin: Am I the only one that’s a huge Big E mark here? I mean seriously, I was completely wrong about this guy. When he was down in NXT doing a version of King Kong Bundy’s “5” gimmick where he made the ref count to 5 instead of 3, so his moves seemed so much more powerful because he could keep a guy pinned for longer, I just thought of him as just another muscle that I couldn’t/wouldn’t care about. Little did I know a few years later I’d be launching off my couch to cheer his IC Title victory. The crowd was completely into it, I was completely into it, and it was a great moment. ….but… ummmm… why did it happen on Raw? THIS should have been the stage for Big E to win his title. At one of the “big” (quotations because this PPV is going to be terrible) PPVs!! Oh well, I’m not going to complain much, because he finally took the title from Curtis who has grown stale very quick. How do you get that stale, that quick, with PAUL HEYMAN in your corner? I’ve given up on Curtis. He grew stale quick as McGuillicutty, he has grown stale as Axel (WITH PAUL HEYMAN… seriously… this blows my mind), and I just think WWE needs to stop trying so hard with him. He doesn’t have it. Big E crushes Curtis in the rematch.

• Traditional Survior Series Elimination Tag Team Match: Natalya, The Bella Twins, The Funkadactyls, Eva Marie & JoJo vs. AJ Lee, Tamina Snuka, Kaitlyn, Alicia Fox, Rosa Mendes, Aksana & Summer Rae

Booth: This match could be really entertaining – as long as you don’t give Eva Marie a big role. With the hit E! reality show ‘Total Divas’ returning to the airwaves recently it’d be kind of silly to have their team lose. This show has been a total guilty pleasure for this guy. I’m ashamed to confess that I even got excited when they announced this match up. Should be very interesting to see AJ and Kaitlyn on the same team and see how well the Divas work together. I’ll take team Total Divas with Natalya eliminating AJ to close things out.

Sheehan: This one will be fast and furious. Expect lots of tags to give everyone some ring time in what will be a short match. I predict the total divas cast will win because a 7 person heel celebration is highly unlikely. Brie Bella will be the last woman standing.

Reno: Oh hey, that’s a lot of divas. You might as well name this match “Total Divas vs. AJ Lee and everyone else”. Now that Total Divas is back, you have to think that the cast is going to win this match. I still watch that show, and it’s still amazing, thanks for asking. Verdict:  Cast of Total Divas

Langevin:  This is a commercial for Total Divas that happens to be playing on a PPV. That is all. Seriously. It’s just a Total Divas commercial. Don’t overthink this, Chris. Just don’t. I think I’ll be making popcorn or peeing during this match. You overbook the divas (by putting 14 of them in ONE match) and you’ll get a mess. This match will just be a Total Mess (a new title I’m pitching to E! for the show).

Winners: Is there really a winner?

Losers: The fans. We all lose in this one.

• Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Tag Team Match: Cody Rhodes and Goldust, The Usos & Rey Mysterio vs. The Shield and The Real Americans

Booth: I’m a sucker for anything Codydust and The Shield. Add The Real Americans in the mix and you’ll find me glued to the television. Just like Cody and Dustin vs. The Shield at Battleground, and the triple threat with the Usos last month, this will be the best match of the night. Mysterio is quite the crowd pleaser as well so I just don’t see how you miss with this one. Oh ya, on the one year anniversary of The Shield – do they break up? That may be something they save for RAW on Monday since all of the big occurrences seem to be saved for the night after the pay-per-views. As for the match itself – I’ll go with the good guys taking it. Codydust survives.

Sheehan: The second traditional survivor series match-up is basically to satisfy the theme. It has no great significance and won’t be anything special. The returning Rey Mysterio is likely to win this one for his team.

Reno: Oh snap, Rey Mysterio’s back everyone. That’s right, my favorite wrestler as a child is back….and he’s still hardly capable of wrestling at this point. Mysterio had a noticeable limp in his last match on RAW, but luckily WWE is sort of masking it by putting him in large tag team matches to at least lighten the load on him. So we probably won’t see him for very long in the ring Sunday night at Survivor Series, but it’s exciting to have him back still. I’m really loving The Real Americans lately, and how can you not love the Rhodes family, the Usos and the Shield? I don’t even know who to root for in this match, I’m just going to expect a crazy good match. If I had to guess, I think the good guys win this one too. The younger audience must be pretty depressed at this point, seeing all of their heroes getting stripped of what they’ve worked so hard for their whole lives. I think it’s time to bring some joy for the holidays, am I right? Verdict: Cody Rhodes and Goldust, The Usos and Rey Mysterio

Langevin: Over/Under on how many moves until Rey Mysterio gets injured again? I have the currently line at 7. I may be taking the under too. I like having little Rey Rey back, but after seeing him move slowly, gingerly, and limping a bit on Raw, it’s a little hard to say I’m happy to see him back. I think at this stage in his career, after his 893589th knee surgery, it’s best if he just took his time and got healthy. That said, I think this is a good Survivor Series match and will highlight a lot of the mid-card talent the WWE has today. I think the Rhodes, Usos, and Mysterio will take the victory in this one, with Cody and Rey being the sole survivors.

• WWE Heavyweight Championship: John Cena (C) vs. Alberto Del Rio

Booth: If Cena wins, does Del Rio finally leave the title picture. Say what you want about Del Rio, the guy doesn’t seem to ever take a vacation. He’s one of the hardest workers in the business. I say it’s time for that vacation. The fans could use it more than anyone. Unless, of course, you want to bring back Ricardo and the new car every night gimmick. I can deal with that. Cena via STFU. 

Sheehan: To steal a phrase from the Miz; Really? Really? . Really? Really? . . This truly is the match nobody wants to see. Del Rio is about as over as Brad Maddox and I doubt he ever will be. Most overused Superstar since Triple-H. Cena will win this at a canter.

Reno: There’s been rumors about Cena being rushed too fast after a successful elbow surgery and the elbow still bothering him, which almost makes me believe that Del Rio will be able to get his belt back and give Cena more rest.  But it’s John Cena, and the WWE would put him through hell and back if it meant more sales.  There is no way Cena is going to lose this match.  Del Rio needs and Attitude Adjustment anyways.  Speaking of which, who’s idea was it to switch the FU to the AA?  What happened to the Attitude Era? Verdict: John Cena

Langevin: John Cena. Need I say more? It’s John Cena. John. Cena. The REAL face of the WWE. He’s bringing prestige back to the World Heavyweight Championship for the first time in long time. There’s no chance he’s losing it that quickly. I expect a clean and decisive victory here, so that he can move on to his next foe.

• CM Punk and Daniel Bryan vs. Luke Harper and Erick Rowan (with Bray Wyatt)

Booth: What better way to get the Wyatt Fam over than having them feud with the two best wrestlers on the roster today? That’s rhetorical. It was Bray that got me interested, but it’s been Harper that’s kept me interested. Him and Rowan are a throwback to Tobe Hooper’s Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and they have the in ring skills to back it up. The WWE was in desperate need of more characters, and with these three we won the lottery.

One of my favorite RAW moments this year was watching the chemistry and dialogue between Harper, Rowan, Wyatt and The Shield during their 6-man tag against Punk, Bryan, The Usos, Cody and Goldust. These guys are starts for years to come and I think they knock off Punk and Bryan and there will be nothing clean about it.

Sheehan: Team Goat-Punk against the two other dudes in the Wyatt family will undoubtedly be match-up of the PPV. Wyatts will come hard and fast in a style which hasn’t been seen in the WWE in years. Bray will undoubtedly interfere but I see Punk and Bryan taking this one. Hopefully after this Punk rekindles his feud with Randy Orton and the authority make brother-in-laws Bryan and Cena battle it out because, after all, that is what’s BEST FOR BUSINESS.

Reno: YES! YES! YES! YES! This is the match everyone wants to see. A Punk and Bryan tag team is an awesome idea. We’ve got two shorter athletic guys going up against two brute psychopaths with incredible beards. Punk is the odd man out here with his mutton chops, but he’ll make up for it. It’ll be an exciting match and you have to think that Punk and Bryan win and get the crowd going. We saw the Wyatts and the Shield sort of face off against each other a few weeks ago, and you have to think that they’ll eventually go up against each other, giving everyone what they want to see. I’m thinking one of these trios would probably have to turn face eventually for that to happen, however. Verdict: Punk and Bryan

Langevin: I’m actually excited for this match. It’s going to be GREAT! The Wyatt Family has been such a fun faction since they debuted down in NXT and I’m such a huge fan. Then you have CM Punk and Daniel Bryan, who I’m even a BIGGER fan of, and now this match has me excited. It’s going to be fun to see where this leads and if it leads to a longer and more played out storyline, and for that to take place, I would need to assume that Rowan and Harper come away with the victory to push this on. They will do so with a little help from the X-Factor, Bray Wyatt. I think he distracts Punk or Bryan, leading to a loss, and maybe including him in next month’s PPV match. If you haven’t yet, it’s time to Follow the Buzzards.

• WWE Championship: Randy Orton (C) vs. Big Show

Booth: The first time The Big Show won the WWE Championship? We’d have to go all the way back to 1999 for that. It was the Survivor Series inside of Detroit’s Joe Louis Arena, and it would be the first of two title reigns for Show. He’d claim the strap again three years later inside of MSG at – you guessed it – Survivor Series. 11 long years later and it’s finally time for Vince’s Giant to begin his third run as WWE Champion. He deserves it.

Sheehan: I never have been the biggest fan of the worlds largest athlete and his feud with Orton hasn’t helped that. It looks like the Authority isn’t as much in favour of The Viper as the face of the WWE as it seemed to be a few weeks ago. I see Orton giving up the belt here and turning babyface with an RKO to the livid HHH.

Reno: Can we please give the belt to someone other than Randy Orton for more than one night? I don’t even care if it’s the Big Show. This has gone on for too long. What’s best for business is no longer what’s best for business. I think we’re going to finally see a trend of good guys winning this PPV. Orton will land an RKO once or twice, but Big Show is too massive to go down to the Viper, and he’ll get the KO he deserves. Triple H will be furious, and we’ll see a setup for Big Show vs. Triple H. Verdict: Big Show

Langevin: *Sigh* I think this storyline is far from over, but I’m so over this storyline. What was once supposed to be the launching point of Daniel Bryan into superstardom and the WWE “making” a new star… it has turned into a showcase of 2 guys that have been around forever that people lose interest in FAST. Not to mention the even bigger part of the storyline is HHH, which again, people are losing interest in FAST. This is just an awful storyline that had such promise until one bad PPV rating caused the WWE to abandon ship and just go back to a comfort zone. Anyways… for the actual match, the storyline must continue, so I think Big Show does not walk away from the title after some overthought and false ending for the (roughly) 19588375897312 PPV in a row. Give or take 19588375897307 PPVs.